I’m a married woman in a BDSM relationship with my son’s wife who acts as my dom. I’m here because I can’t tell my family or friends and I can’t stop myself no matter how cruel she is.

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If she's being too cruel to you, I hope you're able to set your boundaries, communicate them to her & make sure she doesn't cross them. I feel like you might also benefit from looking for another dom.

Oh that sounds messy!! I think BDSM is freeing and healthy with the right partners, and you shouldn’t feel bad about kink. Although I’m sorry to hear it’s complicated your life so much.

Can I ask how she is cruel to you?