#1296
Top of the week
My life is a disaster I’ve wasted every second of it. Tonight will be the end of it. I have over 25k hours on youtube alone. I weigh at 260 and people make fun of me all the time. Im going to end it all. Goodbye to all my friends and family. It will be hard but I’m gonna go to the gym. Im going to leave my life and all my toxic friends and family behind and stop being a baby. When I’m back I’m going to be unrecognizable.
Sometimes, I feel wrong for being a man. Not doing anything, just simply existing. I get this immense feeling of guilt, like I'm harming others in some way just for existing as a man. I know this is so pathetic to even vent about, but is there anything I could do to stop feeling this guilty?
I’ve been engaging in explicit sexual discussions online with someone who is not my husband. Sometimes I end it and then go back. It’s the most aroused I’ve been in years.
I’m 16 addictions have ruined my life. nothing is fun to me anymore, all the things i loved to do and people i loved to talk to simply don’t interest me anymore. i don’t feel excitement from anything cause nothing can top that dopamine rush. i’m in a perpetual state of boredom always feeling like something is missing. i feel like i’ve lost myself. god help me
I tried magic mushrooms and they are overrated. I only saw an imaginary alphabet on my wall, warped images, and a so-called sacred knowledge of who created the earth.
I'm having intrusive thoughts about SH. Never done it before and I know I shouldn't start. I don't know why I want to. My life just feels so pointless I want some sense of control. I keep talking myself into it thinking I could do it somewhere easy to hide. I don't know who I can talk to about it without changing how they see me forever.
Thinking that people wouldn't miss you if you dissapeared and then watching them actually not care at all when you remove yourself really does hurt.....they act like you never existed in the first place. I wish I knew why no one likes me
I like to go to the mall after not showering for a couple of days, and sneak underwear into the dressing room and try them on, and when I'm done I put them back just so who ever buys them has my scent.